Simple pleasures in a busy week!

It's a busy week- as always! Jim has gone to bed early with ear ache and is finding Line Managing hypochondriacs a challenge (+21 separate episodes illness in less than 12 months..some ladies let the side down lol!)- I thought I would try and write the romantic things that are still possible in a busy week when one of you is ill!!

• Make A TV Date- Dating in the Dark on a Tuesday on Living strangely gets us in the mood- for a good chat about relationships at the very least!
• Send lots of  little texts to each other in the day- 4 words and a symbol can say a lot!
• Clear up all the washing up early so your spouse can really enjoy/ get on with their work from home.
• Look at other people's blogs together- one of our followers has some amazing arty/erotic photos.
• Buy and steam and butter in-season asparagus- surprise your partner with an unexpected treat!
• When your partner is late, got caught in traffic, has work at a time you thought they were free- surprise them with your patience!
• Be interested in their day- remember where they said they were going/meetings they would be having and show you are genuinely interested.
• Give specific praise compliment them in a very 'ungeneral' way- I will quote 2 of Jim's texts this week:  Monday- "Thank u for listening last night. Sorry that i am so complicated xx have a wonderful day in ur sexy shorts" Today -" You looked really hot this morning. Have a wonderful day and i am so pleased u had a different Monday".

No babysitters ahhh!

Have tried ...both sets of parents, Godparents...and no babysitters can be found!!- Our daughters meanwhile have been in on the phonecalls and are now saying they will play happily, we will still have time for just the 2 of us and they will go to bed early without a fuss and leave us by the campfire!- they are actually ridiculously excited themselves about staying in a gypsy caravan..with us!!


So the challenge has changed, we need to be able to create that romance and closeness that time alone away together can allow to develop- with our children there too!- we will have to create some different ground rules for them from their normal ones where they realise the main aim of the time away is for Mummy and Daddy to be focussing on grown up time and  that their relationship for that weekend will be a priority. The girls know that we rate our relationship highly anyway but they do end up with us giving them the 'best of us' a lot of the time, which means that when they are finally in bed that we can be too tired and have used up a lot of inner resources already!.

It's booked .....

We have booked a gypsy caravan for two for the August Bank Holiday weekend...yay!-we have been there before and had a really fantastic time-nothing to do but read books, make a log fire and sit by the lake...red wine and toasting marshmallows  mmmm.......our task now!!!-to find a babysitter!

Pictures from last year .......

Challenge Number 2 ...

After a lovely day at the beach, eating fish and chips followed by Ice cream we returned home (with two tired children - one with a cut knee) to pick our romantic challenge for this week.

The challenge is .......... Book a romantic weekend away for 2!!

Yeah!!!!

New Challenge

Tonight after a visit to the beach we are going to pick our next challenge for the week. If you have any suggestions please get in touch - blog or email keeptheromancealive@gmail.com. We love hearing from you all.


Niamh and Jim x

Really think about what SHE would like..

Niamh..I had a really stressful day at work yesterday. I am a new teacher and if I classes go badly- I don't dwell on them in the day, but once night or early morning comes I lie awake going over them again and again in my mind..Jim knew I had a bad night, he got up when the girls did, brought me the most lush cappuccino in bed, found my old Delia book and made loads of pancake batter for me and the girls- mine were brought to me in bed... followed by would you believe it.. Eton Mess (with blueberries,strawberries and raspberries yum!).He then told me to stay upstairs as long as I wanted and from the noises downstairs (and the happy sound of Glastonbury blaring!) he is doing a load of clearing up downstairs. I am consequently lying in contented decadence and have the time to write this blog in bed. The self critical thoughts of the night now seem a world away. Thank you Jim!


Tip for making your partner feel REALLY special- ..in the early years of marriage Jim did kind things often but breakfast in bed (though still lovely) would have been a full English..because he would have brought me what he would have liked himself and also have been able to have some too. Jim this morning made pancakes which he hates! but has realised I would much prefer- Eton Mess he doesn't like either!-he ended up with a bowl of start I think! He really thought about what I would like...and that means even more to me..

Look at the Post It I found under my razor this morning!

The Amazing Post It Note

It was wonderful to open my packed lunch at work today to discover that Niamh had hidden a Post It note between my sandwiches. It was amazing to read the note and know that she was thinking about me today.


Why don't you try leaving a Post It Note for your partner to find .... tell us how you get on.

Challenge .....

It took a while for us to get the children to bed last night. They have this gift of knowing when we want to spend time alone and keep coming down for another drink and not being able to sleep. As soon as both of the children were asleep the wine was poured and the music selected. It was not long before we were both relaxed and ready to try the Social Stirrers.


Both of us took it in turns to select a stick which had a question on. Some of the questions were easy to answer: Are you ever superstitious? and What do you always have with you? The questions that really got us thinking and talking were:

• What moment of your life would you most like to re-live?
• What opportunity do you most regret not taking?
• What is the most spontaneous thing you have ever done?
• What do you wish had never been invented?
• Are you becoming more like your parents?
• What is the most romantic thing you have ever done?

When we get time on are own we often find ourselves discussing children, what bills need paying, work etc. Last night was amazing because we did not set the questions,had the opportunity to have a break from the norm and get deeper into each others mind. We believe it made us closer and enabled us to enjoy the rest of the night which we will leave to your imagination ..... for now .....


Have a go at answering the above questions and let us know how you got on.

The Romantic Husband!

Jim is so far ahead of me on the romance stakes!...He has left me notes in my laptop before work...2 days running!, greeted me before I even get in the house with a proper capuccino, filled a candle -lit bath for me and brought me wine while in it...and then expected nothing back


During the week I find it really hard to resource much more than the hundreds of children related tasks and work responsibilities and cooking etc etc. Jim is really patient though and carries on being romantic and kind regardless. I do need to plan other ways I can show him he is a priority too. Looking forward to an evening of social stirrers with Jim- the lovely white wine helps!!

Facebook

We have just set up a Facebook page!- search for us and add us as a friend in order to stay in touch with updates on our blog.

Mobile Phones .....

Jim ....... Been a strange day so far. Niamh left early for work and I had the task of getting the children ready for school and dropping them off before going to work myself. I sent Niamh a text telling her that I loved her, would be praying for her today and that I could not wait to see her later.


I heard the text arrive a moment later and found that Niamh had left her phone at home! I found it really hard today not being able to contact her and to find out how her day was going. It felt as if I was missing something and left me feeling lost as I went about my work.


Niamh was more in my thoughts today because I did not know how her day was going ...... but was it all so bad if I thought about her more and prayed for her often?

Social Stirrers ....

Let your conversation take new twists and turns around the table with these stimulating sticks. 

Simply take a stick from the tub and pass to the left to have a conversation beyond the ordinary. 





http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jolly-Good-Show-Social-Stirers/dp/B0046AY3BW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1308602539&sr=8-2/keeptheromanc-21

Challenge Has Been Set ........

Not the most exciting option out of the 10 ......... but hey we will give it a go!


Use the Social Stirrers Pot to stimulate fresh conversation.


Feedback to follow.

Ideas we can pick from .......

We will both write down five ideas/situations that we would like to try. These will be placed in a pot and we will randomly pick one each week. When we think of a new idea we will add this to the pot and post on the blog.


Jim's Five

• A fire in the garden while listening to music and drinking red wine
• To take a least half an hour each to massage each other before .......
• To find alternative ways to communicate with each other during the day without using mobiles and emails
• Book a romantic weekend away for 2!
• Have sex in a new place (not in the house)

Niamh's Five

• Look on similar websites/blogs to learn from them..
• Take time to really think about the way the other appreciates things and find a new way to show them how much you value them.
• Try out a new way to have an intimate evening at home - avoid the familiar things you normally do..
• Use a social stirrers pot to stimulate new conversations.
• Do something spiritual together..

Tomorrow we will pick one for this week...

(If any readers have any additional ideas..please let us know and we may add them to our list)

10.15p.m   I was very impressed that Jim chose to spend some of his birthday money on...new bed linen!- time to slip under the new duvet!

The boundaries have been set..

While attempting to pan-fry a romantic supper of asparagus wrapped in bacon! and fending off our daughters' frequent interruptions of 'my toe is so sore'; Jim and I managed to discuss and agree on the groundrules for the challenges and ideas which we will be trying out over this next year! In no particular order...

• Actual, physical Intimacy will only involve the 2 of us.
• Ensure the right balance between giving and receiving.
• We will seek to identify the small gestures as well as the large ones.
• Whatever we do will be glorifying to God.
• Fantasies are fine as long as we would be happy to share them with each other and they do not involve people we know.
• If either of us does not like an idea or wants to stop at any point their wishes will be respected without question.

Contact us

If you would like to contact us please email: keeptheromancealive@gmail.com

Mussels and Cabernet Sauvignon

So there we were sitting in the restaurant eating mussels and drinking Cabernet Sauvignon, conversing about the past 17 years of marriage and the challenge of keeping the romance alive. We came to the conclusion that we both faced countless pressures that seemed to sweep in and steal those opportunities for us to be able to keep the romance alive. Those pressures being work, church commitments, young children, finance, extended family, avoiding familiarity and a messy home! 


After all the mussels had been devoured and the good red drunk .... to quickly ..... we came too the following conclusion: Over the next year we would endeavor to explore different ideas to spice up our married life. In this blog we will share the ideas we try and we will both individually write how they went for us. 


So this weekend we will set the boundaries and list the ideas we have in mind, in order to begin this journey of discovery.


We would love you to join us on this journey, adding your own comments, especially if you are trying our ideas out yourself.  We invite you to email us any suggestions that you think we should try -within our boundaries!.